"I would be lying if I told you I wasn't nervous. I was freaking out initially, the sheng stand SCO provided was taller than expected and I was quickly pushing my pipe downwards to make it shorter to suit my height. I was shaking all over. Again questions filled me. What if I screw up? What if I let these people down? What if, what if, what if?

Zhaolaoshi's conductor baton was raised. The sprint towards the finishing line had begun.

Initially at the opening of our set piece, I panicked and forgot my chords for about 2 bars. When I caught myself, I realised that I simply didn't care anymore. Nerves? What are they? I moved to our music. I performed to our spirit and bond. The notes just came naturally, like they were a part of us. The feeling is indescribable. I forgot what I was doing. Flashbacks flooded my entire self: the Journey, how we fought together, the warmth we shared. The overwhelming feeling you get after the realisation of everything and anything. That's when you really understand that it's truly the Journey that mattered. That few minutes, every one of us were connected by the heart, connected to Zhaolaoshi. It's when we're on stage, sharing the pride with 80 other people that we realise, breathing together with everyone else is not impossible. Before I knew it, Yanxu sang the finishing line of our choice piece, Empress Earth.

A few beats later, it was over.

All these months of preparation, in exchange for just a few minutes of glory on stage, bathing in the spotlights. Those few minutes came through much anticipation, but were gone like the wind. Zoomed past us. Quickly. At lightning speed.

I had no idea why, but I felt like crying. I remember hugging random people and simply just crying out. We all uttered the same things into the ears of each other.

"我们做到了。"
These 5 simple words held so much meaning. We, 81 individuals, have crossed the finishing line together. Not as an orchestra. But as a family, hand in hand. These 5 words were able to trigger so much emotion from the depths of our members there and then.

2 years ago, those tears were of happiness and relief. 2 years later, there was a new essence in those droplets oozing from the edge of my eyes. Sadness. The end of our last note of Houtu marked the end of my Journey with CCHYCO.

From then on, I knew. I will never be able to fight alongside CCHYCO with a common goal anymore. To us, the graduating batch, our chapter ends here.

Saying that CCHYCO is the best thing that has ever happened to me is even an understatement. Before joining, I never truly believed in the power of unity. I didn't know I could be so bonded, so together with people from different classes, different levels, different ages. Before the 2009 SYF, I didn't believe that we could perform on stage and simply just enjoy ourselves. 2 years later, at the Chinese Orchestra SYF 2011, I experienced that miracle again. It's like magic: it only happens if you believe in it.

Thank you, my second family. For teaching me how to love, for giving me the chance to experience these emotions, for letting me know that there will be a place where I will always belong to. In CCHYCO, I found my refuge, my haven. I don't believe that there is anyone at all who've regretted participating in this long run with us.

However, it's time to let go now. It's time to leave things to our juniors. We have to leave to do what we should now: to study for our O's.

Sometimes it's really when we've reached the destination and looked back on our journey that we realise how much we've grown throughout.

We returned to school, feeling happy and invincible. I also felt super happy and proud when Junhong asked how many are confident of attaining Gold with Honours and most juniors had their hands up. My smile could've reached my ears then. We packed our bags, sat around and waited for Jiaee to conduct her last debrief.

Our sweet juniors surprised us with a cake! And they said "Thank you sec fours and fives!" together. Indeed, we were all extremely touched :) Also, the juniors were assigned to give a letter of appreciation to us, the sec4s and 5s. Liwen was assigned to me! :D

Sigh, I'm really happy that I have such wonderful juniors.. Always looking out for me, acting like younger brothers and sisters, making me laugh, making me happy. Weizhen says we're the roots of her confidence. However to me, they are the reason I keep fighting on, because their hard work made me realise that I'm never alone in this web we're caught in. They're like the personification of my optimism and hope.

At the end of the day, there are people who are sad, there are people who are happy. But whatever our emotions, we know they are there because of our common love towards our orchestra."
- Quoted from Jiamin!!!

She got the exact same feeling that I had ahahah so I decided to post it here, to remind myself too. :) Her English seriously damn pro one -_-

19; NUS
31 December

Facebook | Twitter
Tumblr | Instagram







layout: Hearts;Bleach
resources: xx